Ensign Redshirt: Two PM

Citizen snitches are the best friends of law enforcement, let me tell you. I got a few calls in the last fifteen minutes, all with Evil Spock sightings. So, thanks to our reader participation in the Vulcan-hunt, we know Evil is on the highway out of Los Angeles. Or at a downtown hotel. Or perhaps at the hospital. Hey, we used to think Evil was pretty much everywhere, so this is progress.

I’m trying to stay confident, but part of me thinks this is the work of the Cacophony Society. They are a “randomly gathered network of free spirits united in the pursuit of experiences beyond the pale of mainstream society,” which means their members are not beyond a little cop baiting. CS originated from the surviving members of the San Francisco Suicide Club, which has a flawed mission statement, in my opinion. Not very sustainable. As their literature says, you may already be a member of the Cacophony Society. You might know this if you are currently dressed as Santa Clause or dressed in an animal suit at a bowling alley.

In the past, Cacophonists have roasted pigeons (not really), filled teddy bears with cement (putting them back on toy store shelves), and dressed as clowns to see how far they can push area business men by being annoying. CS is a form of dadaism, which like existentialism before it is something I’d have to look up in my spare time. Short of that, I can tell you that the Cacophony Society has some philosophical overlap with discordianism and other public experience groups, like Improv Everywhere.

There’s more to say on that topic, but I have to meet with the President’s ex now to get the dirt on a government conspiracy. Keep your cards and letters coming.

Transmission ended!